I’m thinking of a spiritual lesson I’ve had to learn over and over in my life. It’s the simple fact that God wants all of me.
What do we mean when we say “all of me” (all of you)? Think of our many parts . . . our mind and its reasoning, our memory, our desires, our freedom, our work, talents, relationships etc. God wants to be in charge of all these things.
The problem is I want to be in charge of them. After all . . . It’s MY life!!
So throughout my life, I’ve tried to strike a deal with God. “I’ll give you most of me Lord. You can have my work and those work relationships. You get back what gifts you’ve given me (my big mouth). I’ll even throw in what kind of TV I watch (nothing smutty, you wouldn’t like that). All this is Yours.”
“But . . . don’t ask me to give you my habits or my preferences. I’ve spent a lifetime developing them: my bedtime, my cocktail, my personal time, a particular hobby, etc., all these are mine. I’ll do what I want with them.”
So God is patient. He lets us have our way. Habits and preferences (even the good ones) start to protect themselves. To the point where they can start to run the show. We start living in a way that expects these habits to have no interference. (“What do you mean the plane is delayed? This just can’t be. I have to be in Rochester this evening!!” OR “No coffee!!? That’s ridiculous!”)
Once again God lets us have our way. And I don’t know about you, but every time I take free reign of my life, with no concern for God’s will (I’m a good guy – – I don’t need God’s will to tell me what to do) . . . things get muddy.
It’s weird. I start out wanting a little “life for myself”. God won’t mind. And now I discover there’s a growing part of me that doesn’t want God interfering with my habits at all.
Now look what’s happened to God. God becomes “the Law”, the cop in my rearview mirror. A kill joy, someone to fear or at least avoid. This friends is the effect of original sin in us. God is someone to flee.
Poor God. How we twist things about Him. How we make Him out to be some grumpy boss who loves to order people around. Our vision of life slowly changes. Happiness is something to be grasped by ourselves. God is someone to flee. Adam and Eve hid themselves.
So what went wrong? We did. We failed to give God everything. Call it what you want . . . mistrust, selfishness, pride, arrogance . . . it’s all the same. It’s a voice that says, “NOBODY IS GOING TO TELL ME WHAT TO DO.” Quietly God calls to us but we’re not in the mood to listen.
Ever have that feeling? Ever hear yourself saying that? Welcome to this fallen world.
We’ve forgotten that God loves us. We’ve forgotten that, in His knowing love, He knows us better than we know ourselves. He made us! And it’s from this love we receive His will. And, get this. God’s will is our true happiness! St. Ignatius of Loyola, founder of the Jesuits, prayed this prayer (The Suscipe) for God to have all of him. See what you think.
Take, Lord, and receive all my liberty,
~ St. Ignatius of Loyola
my memory, my understanding,
and my entire will,
All I have and call my own.
You have given all to me.
To you, Lord, I return it.
Everything is yours; do with it what you will.
Give me only your love and your grace,
that is enough for me.
Next Week Pentecost!!
Fr. Tim
Scripture Readings for the 7th Sunday of Easter (all)
First Reading: Acts of the Apostles 7:55-60
Responsorial Psalm: Psalm 97:1-2, 6-7, 9
Second Reading: Revelation 22:12-14, 16-17, 20
Gospel: John 17:20-26
Scripture Readings for Pentecost Sunday (all)
First Reading: Acts of the Apostles 2:1-11
Responsorial Psalm: Psalm 104:1, 24, 29-30, 31, 34
Second Reading: 1 Corinthians 12:3b-7, 12-13
Gospel: Romans 8:8-17